Friday, June 3, 2011

Fashionable Friday: Fashion Emergency.

Today... I got stuck in a dress.

I don't mean like "oh haha, this dress is so tight these buttons are a little tricky to un-button" stuck - I mean in a full panic, trapped inside a cotton-poplin prison, worried I was going to have to call the fire department or something - stuck.

You see, I really, really wanted to wear my favorite white J.Crew dress with my pink & white plaid Liz Claiborne jacket because the weather was perfect for it (you see, it needs to be not a BILLION degrees to wear the jacket, but you can't wear it during the fall or too late in the summer because the colors are so bright and Easter-y) but my post-pregnancy boobs are just a little (read - a LOT) too big for it. However, I was determined to wear it.

So I tried it on and attempted several (unsuccessful) times to zip it all the way up, but that stupid little zipper kept stopping the second it got to the bust. Finally I gave up and tried to take it off, here was where the fun began.

I could NOT get that zipper to un-zip. I swear it was mocking me for yanking on it so many times. So I tried to take the dress off without un-zipping it - BIG mistake. I tried to take it over my head (because there's no way it was fitting over my hips still zipped) and I could not get it over my stupid boobs. I tried everything, letting all the air out of my lungs, sagging my shoulders, doing one arm (and boob) at a time but nothing worked.

Once I finally got it worked over one side, I tried to snatch the other side up real quick resulting in my hair getting stuck in the zipper.

Great.

So then I faced a giant dilemma. Remember, Joshua and Sawyer have already left - so I am home alone with a white dress hanging around my neck on one side and under my arm pit on the other with a giant knot forming where my hair meets the zipper. So what do I do? Call my mama and see if she can drive to my house and free me from the dress? Do I sit here and struggle like a maniac with one arm?

I had one more idea - maybe if I took off my strapless bra that would take away some of the circumference of my bust. I clumsily removed it with one hand (I felt like a middle school-aged boy fumbling with a girl's bra) and ta-da I got the dress over my chest but now I am wearing it like a big white necklace because my hair is still trapped in the zipper. I grab the scissors. At this point, I don't care if I have to cut my hair off - I want OUT of this thing.

Luckily, just a few snips of a few strands of hair and I am free, free at last.

What a way to start a Friday.
FYI - I put the dress back on without the bra - and it fit! So we reconciled and I am wearing it to work :)

2 comments:

  1. hahahhaha you are ridic! your outfit is super cute girl..love the jacket!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. ha! The outfit is super cute. hate you had to go through so much to wear it.

    ReplyDelete